You know the show “What Not to Wear”? The one where fashionably challenged people stand in front of the 360 degree mirror in their favorite skirt so short you can see ass cheeks, and the peasant top they got at the resale shop for $1.
And that is their work outfit… so Stacy and Clinton give them $5000 in exchange for giving over their current wardrobe.
Well there are days when I wished the show was called “We know you get paid next to nothing at work so here is $5000 to go shopping on us.” And then there could be a follow-up show with Bob (the trainer) from the Biggest Loser and it could be called, “You just got a new wardrobe so let’s get RID of your FLABBY BELLY”…
Today I just had one of those clothes days. The kind where you walk out of the door in the morning and feel alright, sometimes even borderline good, about what your wearing, but then by lunchtime you look in the mirror and question if your eyes were closed when you got dressed. I would say I have clothing days like this about five days a week. I am so sick of my wardrobe. Yes, I buy a new piece here or there that I like, but then I pair it with my pants that I am so fricking sick of and it’s all downhill.
I wonder if the people around me notice this midday schlump-a-rama. Is there a co-worker who notices how put together I look when I walk in at 8:30, but when they see me in the cafeteria at lunchtime, they laugh to their lunch buddies saying, “What was she thinking?” The company I work for has some pretty eccentric dressers though.
My cousin used use to tell me how she would spend all her money on designer clothes and then just eat Taco Bell for dinner. Now that is an idea. I like designer clothes. I like Taco Bell. Except I also like pasta, and sandwiches, and CHEESE and… oh hell, who am I kidding the list goes on and on. So is that it? I choose food over looking put together? Maybe the trend on the catwalks next season will be “Schluby Chic”
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4 comments:
What is the big deal about cheese lately? I tell people I'm not eating dairy, and 85% are like, "B.. b.. but what about CHEESE?"
I want to be a part of both of those shows. Except I want Jillian to be my trainer because she would call "fatty" and make me run more.
Also, Lou's comment is so spot on. I actually laughed out loud.
Ya know what. There are so many times when it is good to be a guy. Clothes shopping is one of them.
Any reasonably competent guy can go to Nordstrom and pick out suits for the work week. The hardest part is making sure that the ties match.
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